Monthly Archives: April 2015

Celebrate the miracle of stability!

AJ in superman shirt

Our super little man!

When do you celebrate your child being sick with sinusitis? When you find out that’s what’s making him lethargic, as opposed to a growing brain tumor.

Today, AJ had his second three-month MRI to check on the status of his tumor… and the news is GREAT! His tumor is the same size as it was three months ago, when it was the same size as it was at the end of his proton therapy treatment.

Technically, AJ’s cancer is labeled as stable disease. With cancer, people usually focus on whether a tumor is shrinking (objective or partial response) or growing (progressive disease). We are terrified of a growing tumor and celebrate shrinking as ‘beating cancer,’ but for many chronic cancers, stable disease is something to celebrate.

We can’t say AJ is cancer free, but we can say that LIFE IS GREAT and for at least the next three months, we will celebrate the miracle of stability! The world is beautiful outside when there is stability inside.


Hoping for Contagious… not cancer. MRI on Monday

Many have been asking for an update on AJ so here it goes. He is sick. Really sick. Fort he past 3 weeks he has seemed off. He is doing much better this week but still seems out of it. He is walking slower. Sleeping more. Looking tired most of the time. Wants to be held always.

Camping on the beach for Father & Sons 4/24/15

Camping on the beach for Father & Sons 4/24/15

I put on a big fun event for a large group last Saturday. We have put it on 4 years in a row. This year, the preparations the night before were different. Usually I am busy worrying about the details of the event.  This time all I could think about on Friday night was how sick my baby AJ seemed to me. I cried a lot because everything he did reminded me of the week before he was

Swinging with Aunt Mit

Swinging with Aunt Mit

diagnosed. Slow footing, hint of tipsy, tired, wanting to play but his body was too weak, so instead I would just hold him as he watched others having fun. I felt like I was reliving it but this time we have already done what we were supposed to do to fix it.

Last Friday night, I snuck in to give him a kiss before I went to bed to prepare for my big day the following day and couldn’t leave. I just wanted to be next to him and feel his long eyelashes on my cheek. I wanted to feel his warm high fevered body that was like an electric blanket. Tears flowed, not sobbing, but soothing. Not wanting to show Michael how worried I was about the upcoming MRI, I tried to wait out the tears while laying next to AJ in his dark bedroom. I realized there was no hope of keeping it from Michael, but instead I needed him to share this with me and comfort me. He hugged me and held me as we discussed our fears and what little AJ’s future held. We knelt together and thanked our Father in Heaven for every day we get to have him and hold him and laugh with him. We prayed for strength to handle whatever news might come Monday or any day after that.

BUT, then something WONDERFUL happened… Hunter woke me up at 2 am EXTREMELY sick! We are talking gunk and yuck and blah! I did a little dance of joy in my groggy 2 am state grasping to the hope that perhaps my AJ’s sickness these past 2 weeks has been contagious… not cancer!

A little mommy and AJ nap at the park.

A little mommy and AJ nap at the park.

Of course we have no idea, but we like to hold on to the hope that it is just a bug, not a rapidly growing tumor.

I hesitated sharing any of this because I’m sure to the outsider it must seem overreacting. “Its just a cold…” some might think. And we hope it is. But every time a cold comes to this boy, I’m going to wonder what is really going on inside that head, literally.

Hunter is feeling better today. AJ is a bit better too but still struggling in some things and not back to 100%.

Monday will be the day, maybe not for answers… but at least for an update. We are looking forward to our MRI to see what, if any, growth can be seen of his cancer.

Prayers and love appreciated! Thanks!

Michael with AJ & Houston last night camping on the beach. In the past Michael had said Father & Son's campout was for when they were potty trained and older.  We've learned some things this year and there was NO WAY that this daddy was not taking his AJ this year!

Michael with AJ & Houston last night camping on the beach. In the past Michael had said Father & Son’s campout was for when they were potty trained and older. We’ve learned some things this year and there was NO WAY that this daddy was not taking his AJ this year!

Angels Among Us: Farewell Baby Lindy

Some of you might remember back in December when I wrote a blog post about The Lord carrying us through our trials and a couple women who are examples through trials. I talked about my cousin Sarah who had recently lost her baby to SIDS and a friend Katie who had been diagnosed with cancer and was going through chemo treatments.

Today I want to expound on Katie’s updated story: Good news and not so good news.

The fall of 2014 was a busy time for the Hogue family. Katie gave birth to a beautiful baby girl, Lindy Jo Hogue. Lindy brought joy, laughter and light into her family.
Katie2The week after Lindy was born, Katie was diagnosed with cancer. Despite the terrible disease, the Hogue family continued to be an example of faith and strength. Katie has said throughout her battle with cancer, she felt as if Lindy was sent to her to be a light during this time of hardship.

On April 2, 2015 the Hogue’s celebrated the news that Katie was considered “cancer free”! Happiness filled their family. Next step for Katie was to have surgery to remove the port that had given her chemo treatments every other week for the past 6 months and then begin her life “cancer free”.

She arrived home from surgery, ready to begin her life again as a healthy mommy, to find her sweet baby Lindy, her angel through her 6 months of cancer, had returned to live with her Heavenly Father during naptime. Born the week before Katie’s diagnosis, and returned back to Heaven the day after being declared Cancer Free.

The Hogue family is currently in Iowa for schooling, but will be heading back to Utah for funeral services and to say their “Til we Meet Agains” to baby Lindy.

In your prayers tonight, give thanks for your blessings, and also a special blessing upon the Hogue family .

If you feel so inclined, they have set up a fund to help with travel, medical, and funeral expenses. As the lucky recipient of many donations in the past 6 months, let me assure EVERY donation, no matter the amount, is greatly appreciated (and usually accompanied by tears of gratitude:).